Out of the Closet
by andaere
Summary: Tom accidentally reveals one of his most important secrets to Doug. Doug agrees to keep it hidden, but what will happen when the entire police force finds out? What will happen to Tom's relationships as well as his career? CANCELLED.
1. Revelations

**A/N: **This is my first every fanfic, and I'm really excited to finally be writing one, and a 21 Jump Street one at that! I really, really love reviews (constructive criticism, praise, anything is appreciated), but I'm not going to be one of those annoying people who is like, 'I won't write Chapter 2 until I get 5 reviews.' I'll be writing on my own time, but reviews do get me motivated and I tend to write faster… Just a hint.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything. Not 21 Jump Street, not any of the characters, and not Tom. Oh, how I wish I owned Tom…

I got the idea for this story from reading this great one-shot _Over the Rainbow_ by gin and ironic.

* * *

**Chapter One: Revelation**

Doug sat in his apartment, thinking about the past few months. So much had happened. People had changed so much, Doug, Harry, Judy, Dennis, and especially Tom. And all because of one mistakenly, drunkenly spilled secret. It had all started a couple of months ago.

* * *

The Jump Street gang had been out celebrating after a successful bust. On one side of the booth sat Harry Ioki and Judy Hoffs, and on the other side Doug Penhall and Tom Hanson. At the end of the booth sat Officer Dennis Booker, on a chair. He was the newest officer, originally from I.A.D., and was still a bit of a misfit in the close group. 

However, on this evening everyone was getting along well, even Hanson and Booker, who were normally at each other's throats. Hanson, Penhall, and Hoffs had been working very hard on a case, and had just made a nice, clean bust. They had gone out for dinner to celebrate. Their commanding officer, Captain Fuller, usually stern and strict, had actually suggested the idea.

It was getting late and everyone was starting to leave to his or her apartment. Booker was the first to leave, then Hoffs and Ioki. Finally, it was just Doug and Tom left sipping their beers.

_Hanson should really go easy on the beer,_ Dough thought, a bit amused, as his friend signaled for yet another refill. Doug had refrained from drinking for a while when he noticed Tom had no intention of stopping. After all, someone had to drive them home, and it wasn't going to be Tom in his current state.

Doug was telling Hanson all about the newest football game he had been watching. He could tell Tom was losing interest; he never was one for sports.

"Doug," Tom said suddenly, looking up from the table to Doug with a really weird look on his face that Doug had never seen before.

"Yeah?" Doug said cautiously, trying to decipher the look in Tom's big brown puppy eyes, currently dull with alcohol.

"I–" Tom began, but suddenly his eyes flashed wide in alarm as he noticed a big, muscular guy with spiked brown hair head toward the bathroom. "Hide me," he whispered.

Doug obeyed without question, easily hiding the slim shape of his partner behind his bulkier frame. The guy that Tom seemed to be avoiding passed, and with an audible sigh of relief, Tom sat up from where he had slid down, concealed by Doug's back.

"Thanks, man," Tom smiled, his words having a bit of a drunken slur to them. He reached for his beer and took another long sip.

"No problem," Doug said. "Who was he?" He couldn't help it, he was curious. Doug had a right to know about what his partner was doing, who he knew and who he hung out with. After all, he was constantly being reminded about how partner's had to pay for each other's mistakes.

"My ex-boyfriend," Tom replied calmly.

"Your what? Did you say ex-boyfriend?" Doug wasn't sure he had heard that properly.

"Yeah. He and I broke it off just a couple o' months ago. We didn't part on good terms. He–" Tom stopped mid-slur, his brown eyes widening as his drink-addled brain finally processed what he had revealed. "Oh God," he muttered, seeming to become much more sober in a sort amount of time. "Forget what I said, I mean, he was just a friend of mine that I didn't get along very well with and – and – I gotta go, here's $20 dollars to pay for the bill…"

"Tom," Doug cut off his obviously flustered friend mid-sentence. "You can't drive home after drinking what, like five bottles of beer? Just wait for me to pay and I'll drive you to your apartment."

"Okay," Tom muttered, and fell silent. _I don't even get a thank you,_ Doug thought as he paid the bill. Dough had picked Tom up on his car (he liked his bike better but Tom had some bad memories about motorcycles) so he didn't have a problem dropping Tom off.

Tom was silent the whole 20 minutes to his apartment. At one point Doug even thought that he had fallen asleep. When he arrived at Tom's apartment, Tom thanked him and then hurried rather drunkenly away. If he thought Doug would just forget about the boyfriend comment, he was wrong. Doug would come back the next day and get to the bottom of this mess. Hopefully Tom would be sober and more coherent in the morning, and all of Doug's suspicions would turn out to be silly, false thoughts that they would laugh about later.

Yeah, right. If he believed that, he would believe anything.

* * *

Tom was lying down on his couch, his eyes closed. One word was repeating itself constantly though his sluggish early-morning brain. 

Shit.

It was the morning following his night at the bar. The night where he drunkenly spilled his best-kept and most important secret.

Shit.

And not to mention that he had a massive hangover. And that Doug would be coming some time this day to question the 'boyfriend' issue. Tom knew his partner well enough to know a visit was guaranteed.

Shit.

He opened his tired eyes and looked at the dim, red digital clock, slowly blinking the day away. 6:45 AM. Tom closed his bleary eyes again, but he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep.

Tom thought about all the times he had considered confiding in Doug. Doug was, after all, his best friend on the force, and probably in life, and his work partner. But he had always decided, no, not now, this isn't a good time, maybe tomorrow. Tomorrow, he'd tell himself the same lie.

6:51 AM.

Tom finally gave up the battle for sleep and sat up from the couch. He tossed on the first shirt that he found, a wrinkled white one, and tugged on a pair of jeans over his boxers. He didn't really care how he looked today.

At least he didn't have to work today - it was a Sunday. Tom wandered over to the kitchen and made himself some coffee. He needed caffeine; he couldn't think straight.

After eating a breakfast of cereal and drinking a cup of coffee, he was feeling much better and ready to face the day… and Doug. The clock read 7:32 AM.

Tom was cleaning everything up when he heard a knock on the door. He stiffened and didn't answer. He knew who it was.

"It's Doug, Tom." Doug's voice came from behind the door, the door that was protecting Tom from more pain and embarrassment than he had already endured. "You can't ignore me forever."

Doug had a point. With a sign, Tom walked over to the door, yanking it open. "What do you want?" Tom practically growled. Doug looked good in his black leather jacket that looked good with his carefully messy brown hair. Tom knew that he looked haggard in comparison; he hadn't bothered to comb his hair and had just thrown on whatever clothes he had come across.

Doug attempted to pout, but couldn't pull it off nearly as well as Tom could. "That's not a very nice way to greet a friend," he said with his signature cheesy grin. Tom managed a half smile. Doug could always make him feel better. Except for now.

"At least let me in, Tom," Doug said, his voice taking on a whiny tone.

"Fine," Tom sighed, letting Doug walk in to his tidy apartment and closing the door behind him.

Doug looked around briefly and plopped himself down on the couch. He had been in Tom's apartment many times before and knew where everything was. But he had never been here under these… interesting circumstances. "Look, Tom…" Doug began nervously. "Last night, you told me something about a boyfriend, and you've been acting weird ever since. Are you going to tell me what this is about?"

Tom considered his options, not at all surprised by the question. He could:

1) Reply using the standard response, similar to what he had been doing practically all his life, and just brush it off as drunken rambling

2) Make up some story as to why he had called the guy his ex-boyfriend

3) Tell the truth and finally admit it

Option #3 was strangely, almost scarily appealing. To finally come clean after all these years… and who else to tell the truth to then his partner, and best friend?

But Tom knew that he would go with #1, like he always did and always would do. He wasn't strong enough right now, especially with a hangover and a massive headache (possibly because of the former). Maybe he would admit the truth later. _Who am I kidding,_ Tom thought harshly. _I'll never admit it, not now, not ever._

Tom collapsed in the couch beside his partner; his after-breakfast energy and caffeine sugar buzz quickly evaporating in the tension and reason for Doug's visit. "I was drunk. I didn't know what I was saying. Hasn't that ever happened to you?"

Doug had seen Tom's hesitation and obvious internal conflict and frowned. Something was seriously wrong here. Doug tried to look at Tom's eyes but he wasn't making eye contact. He was also speaking very fast. Both were signs of lying. "Tom…" Doug said slowly, choosing his words carefully. "We both know it wasn't that simple. You seemed pretty sober after you said it, anyway."

"Doug…" Tom finally looked at Doug, his expressive brown eyes begging for mercy, pleading with Doug to let the subject drop. But it was too late, he couldn't do that now. He was too far in.

Tom could tell Doug wasn't going to just drop the interrogation and leave, or change the subject to the most recent sports game. "I–" What was he supposed to say? Tom's headache suddenly returned full force, and he closed his eyes, leaning against the back of the couch.

"Tom," Doug said, worried about Tom's evident signs of physical and mental exhaustion. "It's okay man, I don't care. I mean, it's okay if you're…"

"If I'm what?" Tom suddenly said in a raised voiced, rapidly getting louder. He seemed to regain his energy as his dark eyes filled with anger and pent-up emotion. "You can say it, Doug. You can say, 'It's okay if you're gay.' 'It's okay if you're homosexual.' 'It's okay if you're queer; it's okay if you're a fag. You can say, 'it's okay if you like guys'. Well guess what, Doug, I do! I'm gay and have been for forever, and no one even knew until I freaking let it slip, just 'cause I drank too damn much!"

Doug sat throughout the whole outburst openmouthed. When Tom was done, he realized what he had been doing and closed his gaping mouth. "No – no one knows? I mean, no one knew?" This was all too much to take in. Doug would just get through it one question at a time.

"Well, my mom does, and now you, but no one else knows and I'd like to keep it that way." Tom stopped his pacing and returned to the couch, tiredly sitting down. Now that he had finally revealed his biggest secret and vented most of his anger, he seemed much calmer and willing to talk.

Well, Doug mused. Tom Hanson was gay. This was certainly a new and surprising development.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, I hope you like it so far! If you have any suggestions or anything to say at all, please please please click that wonderful review button! 


	2. A New Case

**A/N: **Yay! I managed to update within a week! I'm proud of myself. This chapter isn't as good as the first one (at least I don't think it is) because I had a bit of writer's block. So sorry about that. And I don't really know where this story is going exactly, but we'll find out eventually...

I want to thank all my wonderful reviewers. I also decided I'd respond to the anonymous reviewers right here.

MK: Thank you! And I can see that the problem of Tom's girlfriends is becoming a big issue, and don't worry, I provided a solution in this chapter. It's kind of a lame, safe solution, but... It's what I thought might be believable.

rubydoo: Thanks! I'm still not sure if I'm going to make this a Doug/Tom or something else... One of the main points of the story, though, is not Tom is gay and Doug isn't (at least a first...)

LilaGrace: Thank you, and like I said, I'm still not sure if it'll be Tom/Doug or not. And yeah, I addressed that issue in this chapter...

catwoman: Thanks so much, that made me very happy when you said it was an interesting idea. Because I realized in all of the other fanfics either Tom and Doug are together or Tom and Doug are straight, but I didn't see many where one is gay and the other isn't and has to deal with that... Was that coherent? It's late and I'm tired. D

A.: Thanks, for the praise and the suggestion. I decided to beta it myself, but if you keep on seeing easily avoidable errors than I probably should get another beta.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, blah, blah, blah, this is so depressing...

* * *

**Chapter Two: A New Case**

"Stay the night."

Doug looked at Tom, then at the clock. They had talked the whole day, and now it was too late for Doug to go back to his apartment.

"Um, I don't know…" Doug responded uncertainly. After everything he had learned, he couldn't help being wary of staying the night with Tom, in his apartment… After all, Tom was gay…

"C'mon, Doug, I'm not gonna do anything," Tom said with a crooked smile.

That man could read Doug's mind. They seriously knew each other too well. "Sure. I know. I'll just sleep here on the couch…"

"Okay. Sweet dreams," Tom responded. He went to his bedroom and started to get ready for bed. Doug just sat on the couch, thinking.

* * *

Doug was remembering what had happened earlier, around afternoon time. Pretty much right after Tom had stopped yelling and started answering Doug's questions. 

Tom had just said, "Well, my mom does, and now you, but no one else knows and I'd like to keep it that way."

"Oh," Doug replied, still at a loss of what to say. "I see. Well, sure, Tom, I mean, of course I won't say anything."

"Good." Tom leaned back on the couch and flashed Doug a tired smile. Doug returned it uneasily, suddenly struck by the fact that he and his gay partner were on the same couch. It was a bit awkward, to say the least, but Tom didn't seem to notice.

Tom closed his eyes briefly and ran his hands through his hair unconsciously. Doug smiled. The action was so familiar. Tom was just the same, but… different. It was a really strange situation.

"Tom?" Doug suddenly asked; a weird thought had come to his mind.

"Hmm?"

"Well, I mean, if you've been… gay… all your life, what about Jackie and Amy?" Doug felt weird bringing Amy up. Everyone at Jump Street usually avoided talking about her. After all, Tom had become obsessive and almost crazy after her sudden death, he had taken it so hard and blamed himself for everything. But, if Tom was gay, then did he really love Amy and Jackie too?

"Oh. I had a feeling you'd ask that. Well, I mostly go for guys, but there were a few girls who I was attracted to also. Amy and Jackie were the special ones."

"So, you're… bisexual?" Doug felt weird discussing his partner's preferred sex. Again, Tom didn't seem to notice his partner's discomfort.

"You could say that, yeah. But mostly, homosexual." Tom looked at Doug again, wondering how he was taking this. He seemed pretty normal, but with Doug, you could never really tell. Tom was feeling perfectly fine discussing all this; it was actually quite enjoyable to him. He was finally able to talk about what he had hidden and kept deep down inside of him for so long, and to his best friend at that.

"I see." Doug was quiet. A million questions were running though his brain, but none that Tom could answer. _How do I act around you now that I know you're gay? How can you be gay? Do you really love boys or do you just go out with them because it's different? Why did you never tell me this earlier? You don't like _me_, do you?_ God, he had no idea what he would do if Tom started hitting on him. _That was stupid. _How could he even think that? Of course Tom wouldn't do that. He was Doug's best friend and he wouldn't ruin their relationship like that. Doug was seriously overreacting.

Presently Tom came out of the bedroom, dressed in his sleepwear, interrupting Doug from his memories. "Do you need anything?" He asked.

"No, thanks," Doug replied. "I'll just sleep in these clothes."

"Okay." Tom could tell something was wrong but decided not to press it. He hoped to God that Doug would keep his mouth shut about the gay thing and that it wouldn't mess up their close friendship.

"Good night," Doug said softly.

"Good night." Tom went back to his bedroom and closed the door, turning off all the lights. Doug lay on the couch, trying, and failing, to sleep. He kept on thinking about Tom being gay, and about the next day. Monday. A workday. He wondered how he would face the rest of the group, and Tom, without giving anything away. Doug finally managed to fall asleep. His last thought was, _If the rest of the force finds out, Tom's screwed_. _The Jump Street program isn't fully supported by the mayor as it is. The last thing it needs is for the mayor to find out that one of the officers that works there is gay._

* * *

Judy Hoffs couldn't concentrate on her paperwork. Too many things were on her mind. 

First, she hated paperwork. It was nothing compared to the excitement of fieldwork.

Second, Tom and Doug were late. There was nothing unusual in Doug being late, but Tom being late was a very rare occurrence. He was always so punctual and tidy and… perfect.

That brought Judy to her third problem. She was falling for Officer Tom Hanson. He was so compassionate and kind, especially to her. He was always there with a shoulder to cry on and a few words of comfort, and he never raised his voice or said anything mean to her. Not to mention that he had unbelievable angelic good looks, with his messy dark brown hair and his big, brown doe eyes, and pale skin with a slight tan that seemed to suit him perfectly. He also seemed a bit vulnerable with his slender but wiry build, especially compared to Doug. She hated how she seemed like a lovesick teenager with her first crush, but this was different. Although Tom never seemed interested in a romantic relationship with her, she was sure they shared something special. Maybe she would ask him out to dinner tonight.

A loud crash and the sound of arguing jolted Judy from her thoughts and announced the arrival of Doug and Tom. Judy looked up from her unfinished paperwork and smiled. She could hear Tom's voice saying, "You said I had three _feet_ of room, not inches! You can thank God the Mustang doesn't have a scratch or you'd be sorry!"

"Yeah, go ahead and blame me 'cause you're too embarrassed to admit you knocked over a trash can with your beloved Mustang because you didn't back up right." It was Doug's voice.

"Shut up," came Tom's reply.

Judy frowned slightly. Something seemed forced about the two best friend's usual morning banter. As she watched Tom and Doug entered the Chapel, Tom stumbled on the step and Doug caught him, then let go of him quickly and didn't make eye contact. It was weird, since when were Tom and Doug so awkward around each other?

"Hi, Judy," Tom greeted Judy when he saw her. "Hi, Iokage," Tom added when he saw Harry, who, Judy realized with a guilty start, had actually been working on his paperwork – not just daydreaming.

"Hi," Harry and Judy both responded to Tom's greeting. Doug gave them both a hearty wave.

"You're late," Harry said. "Fuller's gonna –"

"HANSON! PENHALL!" Came Fuller's stern voice from behind the Captain's door. "In my office."

"Uh-oh," Doug muttered, Tom nodding in agreement. Doug headed towards Fuller's office, Tom following after making an 'I'm dead' face to Judy and Harry. He completely ignored Booker, like he had since he had entered the Chapel.

Judy smiled again; Tom just had that effect on her. As he and Doug disappeared into Fuller's office, Judy resolved to ask Tom out for dinner right after work. She turned back to her paperwork, determined to get it finished if she and Tom would really be going on a date that night.

* * *

As Tom and Doug entered Captain Fuller's office, Tom sighed inwardly as he caught a glance of Fuller's stern face. _Why is it always me? _He thought tiredly. Fuller motioned for Tom and Doug to sit, and they obeyed. 

"You're late," Fuller observed. _Yeah, I know, why does everyone always have the need to tell me that? Are they excited because perfect cop Tom Hanson is not on time for once? If only they knew I was gay…They wouldn't think I was so perfect then._

"Yeah, we know that, Coach, you wanna tell us something new?"

Whoops. He had said his thoughts out loud. Him and his big mouth.

"Excuse me, Hanson?" Fuller said severely.

"You're excused," Tom muttered insolently. Doug shot him a surprised side-glance. This wasn't like Tom at all.

"Hanson, you'll need to drop the attitude if you want to do something other than paperwork these next few weeks."

"Yeah, okay Coach, I'm sorry," Tom mumbled, not sounding very sorry. "Just got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning or something," he added with a glare at Doug.

Doug grinned, but his mind was elsewhere. It was weird talking to Tom so normally now that Doug knew his big secret.

"Well, that's no excuse." Fuller said sharply, and Doug looked up, trying to pay attention. "Listen up, you two. I have a case for you." Tom visibly brightened; finally, a case! Things could get back to normal.

Fuller handed the two officers their files and began to explain the case. "There have been a lot of gay men being attacked and beaten near this high school, Hamurst High. One of the victims, Evan McGurth, died last afternoon. The other victims have suffered broken bones and concussions. You two are two high school students, just transferred in. Both of you should get close to this boy, our head suspect. His name is Andrew Ryans and he has a record of violence and unsuccessful counseling. If needed, we can pull in Booker as a new gay student. All clear?"

"Yeah," Tom said shortly. This sucked too much for words. He just couldn't believe it. It was like some sick, twisted joke, that the case that was supposed to bring everything back to normal was a gay men beatings case. It had been bad enough the other time he had had to deal with a gay case. This time he ran even more risk of being caught or recognized. The Hamurst High School was close to one of the gay bars Tom used to hang out at.

"Are you sure?" Doug asked. Tom shot him a filthy glare. Doug knew how this might be hard for Tom and truly thought it would be better if Tom didn't go on the case. He was under risk of being recognized and even beaten, or his emotional reaction to this case might hinder his police investigation.

Doug could tell how much Tom wanted everything to go back to the way it was before Doug found out he was gay, but that wasn't going to happen, especially if Tom went on this case. "I think it actually might better if Harry did this case instead of Tom, because –"

"Doug," Tom hissed, his eyes flashing angrily. "Shut up!"

In a louder voice, Tom explained to his Captain, "He doesn't know what he's talking about. Just ignore him. I'm going on this case and that's that." Tom stood up from his chair and abruptly left the office, slamming the door shut behind him.

Fuller and Doug just sat there for a few minutes, staring stupidly at the closed door. Finally, Doug said desperately, "I can explain. See, he has some issues about homosexual men. I mean, his cousin –"

"Penhall," Fuller said, his voice surprisingly gentle. "Don't worry about it; we can talk about this later. You're dismissed. I have some things to do."

Doug simply nodded and exited, leaving Fuller alone to ponder the reason for Tom's sudden exit.

* * *

Judy had been sitting in her desk when she heard the door slam and Tom came striding out of Fuller's office, looking pissed off. He sat down at his desk (conveniently next to Judy's, so she could admire him all day long) and began his paperwork in silence. 

A few tense minutes had passed before Judy finally asked, "What happened?"

"Huh?" Tom responded distantly, automatically. His gaze switched from the paper to Judy as he understood what she was saying. "Oh. Well, Fuller yelled at us for being late and then gave us a new case. For some reason Doug didn't think I should do it. But he can't make me get off the case and I'm doing it no matter what, he's just being stupid."

As Judy took time to absorb that, Doug came out of Fuller's office, much calmer than Tom had been when he had exited. Tom looked up from his paperwork and a significant but unreadable look passed between him and Doug. Judy really wondered what had gone on between them.

* * *

Work was finally over. Judy loitered around until it was only she and Tom left in the Chapel. She was going to do it; she was going to ask him out to dinner. Before hadn't been a good time, others had been around and Tom had been in a bad mood. But now, they were alone and Tom seemed to have calmed down. 

"Hey, Tom," Judy said softly, going over to stand by his desk.

"Hey," Tom responded without looking up from the file he was packing up.

"Can I ask you something?" Judy hated how her hands were sweaty and shaking and how she had butterflies in her stomach. She was _not_ a lovesick teenager, she was 24 years old!

"Sure." Tom finally met her gaze, and his chocolate brown eyes took Judy's breath away and almost caused her to forget what she was saying.

"Can you go out to dinner with me?" Judy blurted, blushing slightly. Thankfully, it was hard to notice with her dark skin.

"Tonight?" Tom asked, unable to hide the surprise in his eyes.

"Yeah."

"As a," he hesitated, "As a date?"

"Um, kind of. I mean, we can go just as friends if you want." Oh, God, what if Tom didn't return her affection? What if he refused her offer? Why hadn't she thought of all of this before stupidly blurting out her invitation? She didn't even know what restaurant she wanted to go to!

"Okay, then. Just as friends. I'll pick you up at 6:30 PM." Tom's words relaxed Judy and temporarily banished all her worries. Trying to sound cool, she said, "So it's settled?"

"Yeah."

"Great! See you later." Judy said, trying to hide just how happy and enthusiastic she was. She grabbed her bags and hightailed it outta there, unable to believe her luck.

* * *

_Okay,_ Tom thought. _That was stupid. Rash. What was that, like a pity date or something? Why did I accept her invitation? Why did I give her false hope?_

Tom was in his apartment and it was 6:00 PM. He was about to pick Judy up for dinner. And no matter how much he insisted that it was just a dinner between friends, he knew Judy wanted it to be more.

He had seen the way she looked at him. Almost lustfully. No, not lustfully. Judy wasn't like that. Judy was kind and pretty, not some kind of needy animal. But why did she have to crush on him, of all the guys at Jump Street? Why not Doug? He had just broken up with Dorothy. Or Ioki? Ioki was Judy's partner most of the time, and he was nice. Tom personally thought Ioki and Judy would be a great pair together. Tom didn't even consider Booker, the guy was a jerk and a womanizer.

Tom knew it was pointless wondering why, but he couldn't help it. He was really starting to think some all-knowing and all-powerful force was against him. Assigning him on a gay case, having him finally tell his biggest secret to his best friend and then having his best friend act weird as a result, and making a girl, a friend of his, crush on him when _he was gay_.

There was no way he could even pretend to return the affection. If Judy tried something, he'd just say, "Hey. Why can't we just be friends? I like you and all, but you're not really my type." Or something like that.

Oh God. This was such a weird situation. Judy didn't even know, she had no clue what turmoil she had caused him! Why had he said yes to her offer? _Because I didn't want to hurt her feelings._ Well he'd hurt her more if he convinced her he cared for her in a romantic way and then refused or fended off all her advances!

He was getting ahead of himself here. He didn't even know if she would try any 'advances'. Maybe he was getting this all wrong and she honestly just wanted to talk with him. Hadn't she done things like that to the other officers at Jump Street?

Oh, well. It was time to go. He couldn't sit and worry forever. Tom grabbed a jacket from his closet and left his apartment. Driving to Judy's place in his beloved Mustang, Tom decided, _I'll just have to wing it and see what happens._

* * *

**A/N: **Please review if you have any suggestions or questions or just feel like being nice! And sorry for the kind of sappy Judy paragraphs describing Tom, I couldn't help it. And I apologize for the lack of Booker and Ioki, I'll try to put them in more in the third chapter. I find Ioki a kind of flat character and Booker hard to write, but I'll try! 


	3. Quadruple Shit

**A/N: **I finally updated! I'm sorry it took so long, I had a bit of writer's block at the beginning. Also, I won't have access to a computer from November 21st to November 25th, I'll be off celebrating Thanksgiving. So I tried to write a long chapter to make up for it! Thank you everyone for reviewing, the new ones and the ones that have stuck with me from chapter one (not very far yet, I know, but it'll get more impressive) and here are my responses to the anonymous reviewers:

MK: Really? I haven't. It does seem like a lot of the cute celebrities are (or might be) gay, though... And you're right. Thanks. Here's the next chapter!

rubydoo: Thank you! And yeah, I noticed that Doug always does that, so... Yeah.

LilaGrace: You're welcome! Thanks! And yeah, I don't want to give anything away, but you'll see what happens! And don't worry, this isn't going to be a Tom/Judy fic. Although I'm not sure what it _is_ going to be, I'm pretty sure it won't be Tom/Judy. Thanks, and thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

Jesina: Thanks! And you're absolutely right, for everyone who commented on the gay/lesbian thing, sorry. Had a little brain poof there. I fixed it.

simone: Thanks so much!

**Disclaimer: **I still don't own anything at all, execpt for the plot, which is barely anything, and my journal where I write most of my story down.

* * *

**Chapter Three: Quadruple Shit**

Well, here he was – Tom Hanson, the gay man. Winging it. Improvising. Pretending. He was at some fancy restaurant with one of his closest female friends. On a date. And it was really, really awkward.

At least, it felt awkward to Tom. Judy didn't seem to notice. It was weird, Tom reflected, how one person could feel awkwardness so acutely and the other person didn't seem to be aware at all.

The dinner had gone pretty well, with conversation topics ranging from work to favorite movies. Now it was time for the bill, and Tom was paying. As they waited, Judy was staring adoringly into Tom's eyes as if she could drown herself in them. It was freaking Tom out.

He hadn't known she liked him that much. He had thought it was only a little crush that would disappear if he set things straight or acted like a jerk during dinner. Instead, the crush had intensified.

The bill finally came, and as Tom paid, Judy said, "Why don't we go to my apartment afterward?"

Tom looked at her, deciding what he should do. "Okay," he finally said. He'd be able to tell Judy his true feelings at her apartment.

"Great." Judy gave Tom a beautiful toothy smile. Tom returned the smile uneasily, mentally preparing himself for what was to come.

* * *

Judy was the happiest she had been since her boyfriend had dumped her. She had Tom all to herself. As she drove to her apartment, she side-glanced at him. He was running his hands through his hair in that adorable way he had when he was anxious. Was he as nervous as she was? 

They would have a great time – she knew it. Dinner had been amazing; with Tom acting like a true gentleman, paying the bill and everything.

And now they would go to her apartment and get more intimate. They would start with kissing. And then, maybe, hopefully, Tom would stay the night. In her bed.

* * *

They were at Judy's apartment. Tom looked around, interested. He had never been to Judy's apartment before. It was funny when he thought about it. He had been to Doug's a million times, Harry's, and even Booker's… but maybe not by entirely legal means. But that was a different story. 

"Like it?" Judy chimed in, seeing him looking around.

Tom glanced again at the white walls, the clean but tiny rooms. He saw a pair of boots in the corner of the room and smiled; he could tell a girl lived here. "Yeah," he said. His smile disappeared as he remembered what he was going to do. He liked Judy, _as a friend_. He hated to hurt her, but he couldn't let these false promises go on. He shouldn't have even started them.

"Sit." Judy pointed to a cozy purple sofa on one side of the room. She was oblivious to Tom's intentions and inner turmoil.

Tom sank into the comfortable sofa without a word. Judy sat next to him. They just sat there for a while, unmoving, staring into each other's eyes. Then Judy leaned forward, lips open and eyes closing, getting closer and closer to Tom.

"No," Tom said. Judy pulled back.

"What?" She asked, confused. She didn't understand. Tom had accepted her offer to dinner, had gone with her to her apartment, had sat on the couch with her, and had sent all the right signals. Now as she leaned in to kiss him with perfect timing, he had refused. What was going on?

"Jude, I have something to tell you," Tom began. He wasn't going to tell her about the gay thing. No way. Two people (who weren't ex-boyfriends) knowing about it were more than enough. He could simply say that there was no chemistry. It would be the truth.

"Yeah?" Judy asked slowly, thinking the worst.

"Well, you're a really nice, pretty girl and everything, but, um, I don't date people I work with. I mean, I've always been like that. And, uh, I'm just... not attracted to you." Then he threw in the big cliché, "Can't we just be friends?"

It was that last line that did it for Judy. She had had enough of listening to this crap. "'Can't we just be friends?' Did you get that speech from a cheesy movie or something? What is wrong with you, Tom? You and Doug have been acting weird every since we had that celebratory dinner after we finished our case. And now, now you allow me to take you on a date, and bring you to my apartment, and _now_ you tell me you're 'not attracted to me?'" Judy was so mad, so hurt, she could hardly think straight. She couldn't _believe_ Tom. And to think that she had once been so smitten with him!

"I'm sorry," Tom said quietly. Judy jumped; she had almost forgotten he was still there. Tom had just sat there biting his lip throughout the whole outburst.

"Sorry isn't good enough," Judy snarled.

"You sound like Fuller!" Tom said and laughed. Judy couldn't help smiling – she had thought that too. But she couldn't let Tom see her smile. He had to pay for his actions. She changed her smile to a glare. Tom held up his hands and managed to control his laughter. Judy couldn't help thinking the holding up the hands part was a bit of a Doug-like gesture.

"I know, I know, sorry. Bad timing. Not funny."

"Well? Answer my question, Tom. Why did you let this go on for so long?"

"I just… didn't want to hurt your feelings."

Oh god, how _lame_. Had Tom been reading some romantic novel lately or something, and was quoting from it? "Please, Tom, drop all that. You should have stopped it before it started."

Tom knew now that coming to the apartment and even going on the date had been a mistake. He had gotten himself into this situation and now he had to get out. "I know," he repeated. "I… I should probably go now."

"Yeah. You should. Have fun." Judy glared at Tom's (sexy) back the whole time until he had left her apartment. She only relaxed when she heard the sound of his car leaving. Then she lay down on the couch and began to cry her heart out.

* * *

It was the next day and Tom had arrived to work early. He had hoped that he could get ready to go undercover at Hamurst as 'Tom Harris' before Judy came. He didn't want to see her after what had happened the night before at her apartment. But he should've known Doug wouldn't be so early. 

Judy and Harry had already arrived. Tom had said a rather uncomfortable hello to Judy, but she hadn't even responded. So Tom was just loitering around his and Harry's desk, waiting for his partner.

Finally, the door opened and Doug came striding in, looking rushed.

Tom opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Doug said, "I know, I know, I'm late."

"Actually, no, you're not." Tom checked the clock. "Two more minutes and you would've been, though."

Doug rolled his eyes. After a really annoying, traffic-jammed drive to the Chapel, he didn't want to deal with Tom's particularity. "Whatever," Doug replied. "Let's go see Fuller."

* * *

Doug and Tom were in Fuller's office, but for once, they weren't in trouble. Fuller had already briefed them on the case and who to get close to – Andrew Ryans and his friends. Tom would be going in as Tom Harris, a 'bad boy' who get expelled from his old school and had something against gay men. Doug would be Doug Price, Tom's cousin who would also try to get into the 'gang'. They would be going in unarmed. 

"All clear?" Fuller asked. Tom and Doug nodded. "Okay, then," Fuller said. "Go, and good luck."

* * *

They had arrived at Hamurst. It was a large, long, gray school. It looked depressing. Doug could easily imagine homophobes, druggies and criminals attending Hamurst High. And the staff were to busy dealing with important matters such as overflowing toilets to bother. _Well, we're here to help,_ Doug reminded himself. 

He glanced at Tom, who was looking his 'bad boy' part in a black leather jacket with his favorite gold hoop earring. Doug was worried about him. The whole drive to the school Doug had tried to discuss the dangers Tom would be facing and how to avoid them, and Tom hadn't said a thing. He had just shrugged and tried to steer the conversation in another direction. It wasn't like the homophobes would be able to tell Tom was gay, Doug had reassured himself. It wasn't like Tom advertised it. Still, Doug was worried.

They were going to history class. Possibly the most boring class in a series of boring classes. Luckily, as part of their cover, Tom and Doug didn't have to pay attention. And they got to be late.

Tom waltzed into history ten minutes after the bell rang, with Doug close behind. The history teacher, Mr. Z, looked away from his teachings about World War II or the Great Depression or something like that and focused on the new arrivals.

"Sorry we're late, Mr...Z," Tom apologized with a dazzling smile. "We just transferred in. From Arkwood."

"That is no excuse," Mr. Z said. He reminded Doug of a french fry. Tall, skinny, and greasy.

"Yeah, yeah, we know," Tom replied, rolling his eyes. He received a few snickers from the bored class, obviously glad for this interruption from history.

"Well, Mr.…."

"Harris," Tom supplied.

"Well, Mr. Harris and Mr.…."

"Price," Doug spoke for the first time.

"Price. Take your seats over there at the back, and don't make any more interruptions."

"'Kay." Tom led the way to the back and Doug followed, scowling. He had thought that he would be the main speaker and Tom would be the inconspicuous backup, but Tom seemed to have turned the tables on him. Didn't Tom know what inconspicuous meant?

Tom slid into a seat and Doug followed him. Immediately Tom was flagged by the student in the seat next to him.

"Hey, man," the boy said. He had close-cut brown hair and sharp features. "That was awesome. What's your name?"

"Tom Harris," Tom replied, nodding in the boy's direction. "Thanks. What's yours?"

"Andrew Ryans," he replied.

Tom and Doug exchanged glances. They had sat down right next to the suspect. What a lucky coincidence!

"So," Ryans continued, "Mr. Z is hecka gay, don't you think? Look at the way he dresses!"

Tom glanced at Mr. Z, who was wearing tight-fitting pants and a suit. _You can't tell if a guy's gay by the way he dresses,_ Tom wanted to say. _Gays don't have a separate dress code._ Instead, he said, "Yeah. Hecka gay."

"Yeah," Doug echoed to the right of Tom. Tom realized he had kind of left Doug out. Doug was supposed to be the main talker and Tom the safe little backup, not the opposite. But Tom wanted to prove to Doug that he could do this case, and wouldn't be recognized or have any emotion problems or crap like that. It was somewhat stupid, but Tom had his pride. He could do this case.

"Oh, hey, didn't see you there. What's your name?" Ryans asked.

"Doug. Doug Price. Tom's cousin," mumbled Doug. Tom had never seen him so quiet and subdued before.

"Well, hi, Doug." Ryans greeted Doug and quickly turned back to Tom. "What do you think about gay guys?" Ryans asked unexpectedly.

Tom was startled. Already, here was the open door to get into Ryan's gang. This was a really easy case. _Too easy,_ the paranoid part of Tom's brain claimed. Tom ignored it.

"Uh," Tom responded, "they're like aliens, man. Fags. Stupid, dirty spots on the world that don't deserve to live."

Tom could feel the intense gaze of Doug examining him as he spoke and knew Doug could see the pain in his eyes, how he meant the exact opposite of what he said. How he was going against all his beliefs by saying that. Tom felt so much like saying, ''Gay' guys are just people, and you're stupider than you look if you really think homosexuals are sinners just because of their sexuality.' But he kept his mouth shut, only opening it to spit out fake bile and hate against gays like the worst hypocrite in the world.

Everything about this case reminded Tom of the other homophobe case he had done the year before. It almost exactly like this case. He hoped that he could bust Ryans and his gang before they did any more damage.

"Tom?" Ryans said. Tom realized that he had missed everything that had been said after he falsely declared his hatred of gay men.

"What? Sorry, I kinda spaced out for a while. History is so boring."

"No problem. Listen, we're gonna go and deal with some fags tonight. You wanna come with us?"

"Tonight?" Ryans nodded. That was early, but Tom and Doug could manage to brief Fuller and still arrive on time. Tom glanced at Doug. "Can Doug come?"

Ryans frowned. "I guess. He could be our guard or something, make sure no one sees us."

Tom could tell Ryans didn't want Doug to come. It would be better if he went in alone, with Doug following.

"No, he doesn't have to come. He has stuff to do anyway," Tom said. When Doug looked at him angrily, Tom mouthed, 'backup'. Doug got the hint and nodded, but Tom could tell he was upset about the whole situation.

"Great. See you tonight, then," Ryans said as the bell rang.

Tom nodded. "See you tonight," he confirmed.

* * *

"Backup?" Doug asked angrily. "You can't go in alone!" 

"I won't," Tom replied, sounding bored. "You'll be the _backup_. All I have to do is call and you'll come running."

"I know what backup is. But you seem to have forgotten that _I_ was supposed to lead and _you_ were supposed to follow, not vice versa."

Tom shrugged. He didn't feel one bit guilty. "What's done is done. Ryans liked me better anyway."

As Doug opened his mouth to retort, Tom interrupted him. "I'll be fine, Doug. I'm a trained police officer. I can take care of myself."

Doug knew this was true. He remembered the countless times he had watched Tom go up against and beat someone much bigger than him. Tom looked like a harmless kid (with a lot of attitude) but he was more dangerous than he looked.

Although Doug was still annoyed about the fact that he was only backup (and that Tom had correctly interpreted his anger as worry for Tom's safety… they knew each other too well) he finally saw sense. Tom was right; he could take care of himself. "Okay," Doug sighed. "Let's go tell Fuller."

"Thank you," Tom said, and Doug could imagine him thinking, _Finally_.

They were outside the Jumpstreet Chapel. Tom had been going in to brief Fuller on what was going on when Doug had pulled him away to 'discuss' some issues. Now that the 'discussion' was over, Tom and Doug walked into the Chapel. Only Booker was still inside, working on something. Tom brushed by him without acknowledgement and Doug followed suit. Tom knocked on Fuller's door and waited.

"Come in," Fuller said. Tom opened the door, and Doug… followed. He seemed to be following Tom a lot these days. Doug closed the door behind him, and Tom began to update Fuller.

Doug tried to listen, he really did. But it was boring. He started spacing out, thinking about Tom and the case. Doug's police instinct told him something bad was going to happen. Or maybe he was just being paranoid.

"Penhall?" Fuller's commanding voice snapped Doug back to the present.

"Yes?" Doug asked, hoping Fuller hadn't said anything important. He hadn't been listening.

"You got that? Hanson will go with the guys. You'll follow him. He'll have a radio. If he radios for help, jump in. You'll be with three others, which should be enough. You'll have a gun but Hanson'll be unarmed. And he won't have any wires, they're too likely to be discovered. Hanson, you'll just have to hide your badge, radio, and handcuffs somewhere the homophobes won't notice."

"Okay," Tom said. Doug nodded in agreement.

"All right then. It's about time to go. Be careful," Fuller said. As Tom and Doug left, Fuller hoped they would be okay. He really cared about his officers, and he had noticed how strangely Tom and Doug had been acting. _Hopefully,_ Fuller thought, _everything will be straightened out after this case._

* * *

"I'm Greg. Greg McKar. You with Ryans?" 

Greg was muscular, with black hair in a crew cut. He looked like the kind of person that beat up gay guys for fun (at least to Tom).

"Yeah," Tom answered shortly. "I'm Tom Harris. Will Ryans be here soon?"

"Yeah," McKar responded. They fell silent.

Tom hated even pretending to be going along on this gay beating. When he thought about it, last year's case had been just as bad, but he hadn't fully realized his sexuality then. He had been with Amy. He had been a bisexual. But women hadn't aroused him in a while. Now he just felt… gay.

About ten minutes later, Andrew Ryans came, along with a well-built blonde boy. They would be leaving soon. Tom hoped Doug had enough time to get his backup together. Tom had a feeling he was gonna need it. At least there were only three guys to bust and overcome.

"We'll meet up with Rod when we get to the alley," Tom heard Ryans say to McKar. _Never mind,_ thought Tom, _four_. He could still do four… with help.

"I don't think you've been introduced yet," Ryans said, coming over to Tom, the blonde boy following. "This is George Evans. George, this is Tom Harris." The blonde boy, George, nodded at Tom. They shook hands.

"Okay," Ryans said. "It's time to go. We're gonna go into this alley, which is next to some gay bar called 'Rainbow Pride' or some crap like that. We're gonna meet up with the last of our gang there, Rod Parkins. Then, when we see one of 'em come outta the bar, we give that fag what he deserves."

"Yeah!" Everyone yelled, Tom joining in half-heartedly at the last second, his mind elsewhere. Rainbow Pride. The name rang a bell. He had been there before.

Everything seemed wrong about this. They were going into a dark alley. Tom wasn't supposed to do that. And Tom had no way of telling Doug the change of plans… He'd just have to figure it out. Tom couldn't radio for help so early, when he didn't need any help. Another thing was that the case just seemed too easy. _Yeah, and if I see a black cat I'm gonna drop dead,_ Tom mentally chided himself._ I'm being paranoid here. Nothing's gonna happen._

"Let's go," Ryans said.

Tom pushed away all this dark thoughts and forebodings and followed Ryans and his friends. He would just bust them tonight and the case would be over. Things could go back to the way they had been and there would be four less homophobes in action.

* * *

They had arrived at the alley. It was dark, dismal, and small. Tom, Ryans, McKar, and Evans had to squish in to fit. 

Soon after they arrived, another boy stepped out into the feeble light of the moon. No, not a boy, a man. He looked older than the others did. Tom couldn't see the newcomer very well. He was shrouded in shadows. Something about him seemed familiar, but that couldn't be right. This was Rod Parkins. Tom didn't know him.

"Is he the one?" Ryans asked. He stepped back so Parkins could see Tom better. "Yeah," Parkins said. He had a deep, gravelly voice. _This is weird,_ Tom thought. What were they doing? Evaluating him, making sure he was fit to beat up gays?

Tom stepped forward. He might as well introduce himself if no one was gonna do it for him. "Hi. I'm Tom Har –"

"Yeah, I know," Parkins interrupted. "Tom Hanson."

Tom gaped at Parkins, utterly shocked. How did Parkins know his real name? Suddenly Tom realized why he recognized Parkins. He had been the friend of a friend of a suspect at some school. They had ended up arresting the suspect and the friend.

"Yes," Parkins continued, "Tom Hanson, the smooth undercover cop, who arrested my friend."

Awww. Shit! His cover was blown. Completely blown. It was time to radio for help. Tom reached into his jacket pocket to find his radio and call for help, but it wasn't there. Double shit! Where had he put his radio?

"Looking for this?" Parkins teased, holding up Tom's radio, along with his badge and handcuffs. He must've had one of his cronies pickpocket them or something. Triple shit. _I hate people who go to great lengths to get revenge,_ Tom thought rather hypocritically.

Tom started backing up, and he hit a wall. Quadruple shit. Tom suddenly realized that he was in serious danger. Three muscular teens and an extremely angry and strong-looking adult surrounded him. Tom remembered what Fuller had said in his first briefing about the conditions of the victims of these kids surrounded him now. _Concussions. Broken bones. Death._

Oh god no, not death! Tom still had so many things to do and so many things to say, to Doug, to Judy, To Harry, to Fuller, to his mom, even to Booker.

At least only one of the four had real motivation to beat Tom up. Besides, he was a trained police officer. He could get out of this. He always did.

"I knew I recognized him!" Evans suddenly said. "I saw him at that stupid gay bar we're next to, but we let him go 'cause the guy next to him looked weaker. Remember?"

"Yeah," McKar said, nodding in agreement.

"Great!" Ryans exclaimed, grinning evilly. "Now, pals, we're got ourselves a gay undercover cop. Let's give him what he deserves."

Great. Now Tom was surrounded by four motivated men. But maybe, maybe he could still talk his way out of this. "Guys –" Tom began.

"Shut up," Parkins snapped. "C'mon, let's get going already!"

And then the beating started.

Although Tom had pretty much lost all hope, he tried to fight back. McKar aimed a punch at him. As Tom raised an arm to block it and kicked McKar's leg, Ryan's punch hit him in the stomach. It really hurt. Tom didn't know how much more of this he could take. He was hopelessly outnumbered; and Parkins had some hard club as a weapon that he was trying to whack Tom with. As Tom turned around to punch Evans, Parkin's club hit him in the leg. Tom thought he heard something crack. No longer able to support himself, Tom slid down. On the ground, Tom knew it was really over. The ruthless beatings continued and Tom was unable to retaliate. Tom heard many cracks and foggily wondered just how many ribs and other bones had been broken. After a while, Tom lost count. He was aware of Parkins hitting him with all of his strength on the head, and harsh laughter. After a while, he realized that the boys had left, and he was completely alone in the dark alley.

Then all he was aware of was the pain. It blocked out any coherent thoughts and muddled everything. There was a searing pain in his head, it was hard to breathe, and his left leg hurt. It all blended in to a haze of aches and pain around his entire body. Tom knew he was in really bad shape and needed a hospital, but there was nothing he could do.

Tom tried to say, "Help!" but all he could manage was a harsh, animalistic croak that hurt his throat. He would just have to wait, and hope Doug would find him. _Doug… Where is Doug?_ The thought swam hazily around in circles in Tom's mind. _Where is Doug? Where is Doug?_

Finally, Tom began to sink into the lovely black mattress of unconsciousness. It didn't hurt so much anymore. It was just a dull, pounding ache. He closed his eyes. His last, surprisingly clear thought was, _This wasn't the way I expected to die._

* * *

**A/N: **Things don't look too good for Tom, do they? I'm sorry to leave you with a cliffhanger ending, I know how annoying those are. I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible. For every review I get I'll post the chapter one day earlier! JUST KIDDING. I'm not like that. I might be more motivated if I get reviews, though, so please read and review! And I know I said I'd put in Booker and Ioki in the third chapter, but I lied. They'll be in the fourth one, I swear! Writer's oath. Well, thanks for reading, and please review! 


	4. We'll Get Through This

**A/N: **Hello everyone! Just thought I'd let you know I haven't died, sorry it took so long to update! Something you should know about me is that I'm not a consistent writer. It might take me a week to update or it might take me a month. But still, stay with me, because eventually I will update! Another thing I wanted to discuss with you, my faithful readers and reviews, is the pairings in this story. At the moment where I am now, it could seriously go any possible way. I really have absolutely no idea what I plan to do with the pairings. It could be Tom/Doug, Tom/Judy, Doug/Judy, Tom/OC, Doug/OC, even Tom/Dennis. I need your opinion on what you're leaning toward! Personally, I'm leaning toward Tom/OC and Doug/Judy, or Tom/Doug and maybe Judy/Harry. Please tell me in your review what pairing you'd like best, because your opinion matters and could quite easily influence my writing! And if you're one of the people who doesn't read the long, boring author notes, then you'll never know you had the chance to be influential. What a shame. xD Okay, here's the next update, I'm not so sure about this chapter. It was kind of hard to write. Please tell me what you think! Now, for review responses:

rubydoo: Thanks for reviewing, and sorry I took so long to update!

LilaGrace: Thank you! I know exactly what you mean about Ioki, he always seemed like a boring and flat character to me (no offense meant to anyone who loves Ioki!). I tried to update soon, but writer's block and a life got in the way. P You're welcome for the length, this chapter's shorter, but hopefully still long enough for you. And don't worry about the anonymous reviewer thing, if it sounded in the last author's note that I didn't like anonymous reviewers, I didn't mean it to. I love all reviewers! And I also know what you mean about not trusting the internet, it always gives my computer viruses... Thanks for reviewing!

Oh, and one more thing, maybe I'm being a bit spoiled but I didn't get as many reviews on the third chapter as the others, and that makes me wonder if maybe it was a weak chapter. Oh, well, I hope this one is better and worth the wait! And a thanks to all my reviews who have accounts, if I forgot to respond to your review just PM me and I'll reply pronto. D

I lied - there's another things. The dreaded...

**Disclaimer:** I have stolen Tom and all of the others for my own personal use and will now use him to make money. KIDDING, KIDDING, KIDDING, DON'T SUE ME! I still don't own a thing. Happy?

* * *

**Chapter Four: "We'll Get Through This"**

Doug and his team lost track of Tom. Everything had been going smoothly until Tom and the gang decided to head off to who knows where. Doug had been crouching in the bushes with three other officers. They couldn't get close enough to hear what Tom and the others were saying, and Tom didn't have any wires – just a radio. Doug watched everyone, firmly imprinting their image in his mind. These were the guys he had to arrest.

When Tom turned away and walked off with the other guys, Doug expected Tom to radio him and explain the change of plans. He didn't. So Doug and the other officers just followed them at a distance.

Ryans seemed to be purposely taking the twistiest, most confusing path to wherever they were going. Doug followed, knowing he couldn't loose track of Tom. Tom could arrest two guys on his own, but with three, he would need backup.

Doug and his team managed to keep Tom in sight until they had to cross the street. Ryans jaywalked, of course. Doug was going to follow, but a huge track passed in front of him. By the time Doug could see the other side again, Tom and the others had gone.

Doug and the officers crossed the street anyway. When they were on the other side, Doug ordered a search. They split up, two looking one way, two looking the other. They searched fruitlessly for about ten minutes, but couldn't find any trace of Ryans, Tom, and the gang.

Doug was starting to panic. He couldn't loose Tom, not now! He could be in danger. Doug called the team together, trying to think of a plan.

At that moment, Officer Brookes, the rookie officer in the group, called Doug over.

"Penhall!" he said. "I think I've found something."

"Yeah?" Doug asked gruffly, trying not to get his hopes up. He didn't want to be disappointed.

Brookes pointed to an empty (strawberry-flavored) gum package near an alleyway. Next to it was a coupon for a bowling alley. Doug smiled. Good ole Tom. _Thank you for being a litterbug for once in your life._

"Great job!" Doug said enthusiastically to Brookes, patting him on the back. "Those are Tom's, alright. C'mon guys, we're on the trail again."

Doug and the other officers started walking down the alley after congratulating Brookes (who was enjoying the attention immensely). It was a long, dark, narrow, and ominous (to Doug) alley. They walked down single-file, with Doug in the front and Brookes at the back.

It took about five minutes to get to the end of the alley. Doug could see a bar in the distance, but there seemed to be nothing in the alley. For a frustrated moment, Doug thought he had lost the trail again, or maybe they had been following a false lead. He ventured a bit farther and noticed a sticky, dark, wet substance covering the floor. A terrible sense of dread enveloped Doug even before he saw the unmoving figure huddling against the wall. He knew right away who it was, and what the liquid was.

For a while, Doug just stood in shock, thinking useless thoughts, in denial. _No, not Tom… it can't be Tom… and this isn't blood, it's just… lemonade or something…_

Finally, he had the sense to shout, "Someone call 911!" Moving as if in a dream, Doug walked over to the still figure as the other officers sprang to action.

He gingerly cradled the head in his lap, inspecting the face in the dim light of the moon. He was unsurprised but saddened when he recognized Tom's face underneath all the blood and bruises.

Common sense seemed to have left Doug. He sat for a few minutes, searching for any sign of life from Tom. He thought he saw Tom's eyes flicker. So did that mean he was alive? Finally, Doug realized that he should check for a pulse. He put a finger on Tom's limp wrist and was extremely relived when he felt a weak, slow, but definite pulse.

Suddenly Tom stirred slightly and opened his eyes, blinking them in the dim light. He looked at Doug, his expression confused.

Shocked, but also happy and hopeful, Doug just smiled at Tom.

"Doug…" Tom whispered. His voice was horse and it was clearly hurting him to breathe. "Are… Are you dead too?"

Puzzled and worried, Doug should his head. "No," he said quietly. "You're alive. So am I. Just hang in there, buddy. You can do it."

Tom took another labored breath. "It hurts," he moaned pitifully.

"Shh," Doug said. "Don't talk. Just wait and stay with me 'till the ambulance comes."

Tom was silent for a while, and Doug was able to think. He was worried. He hated acting like Tom was a little kid, but he only seemed to be half-awake and barely aware of his surroundings. He was obviously hurt badly and seemed to be able to talk only with long, painful pauses in between words.

The waited in silence (punctured by Tom's harsh breathing) for a while, Doug mentally urging his partner to stay conscious. _Come on, Tom, you can do this, if you can dress up like a woman and actually look like one, then you can easily stay conscious._

"Doug," Tom said suddenly, looking into Doug's eyes.

"Yeah?" Doug asked, studying Tom's soft brown eyes. Doug had always thought Tom's eyes were the most expressive part of him, and right now they were filled with pain, sadness, and urgency. Whatever Tom was going to say was important to him.

"If I don't make it… will you... tell Jude… that I'm sorry?" Tom's voice was barely above a whisper.

Stunned, Doug didn't respond for a while. There were so many things he wanted to say. _You're gonna make it, Tom; don't talk like you're gonna die! And what about Jude? Are you seeing her? I thought you were gay! _Instead, all he answered with was, "Sure, anything for you, buddy."

But Tom had already slipped back into unconsciousness.

* * *

It felt like hours 'till the ambulance came, but in reality, it was only several minutes. Doug watched numbly as the doctors and nurses loaded Tom onto a stretcher and then into the ambulance. While the other officers answered questions about what and where and when and how and why, Doug joined Tom in the ambulance. He knew he should call Fuller and the others, but someone had to stay with Tom. The other officers could figure out all the little details. Doug would make sure Tom was okay, and call everyone.

* * *

Everything was a confused blur of voices, memories, and pain.

Tom remembered talking to Doug, but he didn't remember exactly what he had said. And now he was in some room, with a bunch of annoying beeping noises and panicky voices all around him. He wished they would shut up and let him sleep.

Doug was still with him, Tom could tell. He was holding his hand, obviously trying to comfort Tom. Tom didn't really see why he needed comforting; everything was fine, just a little confusing. Tom tried to smile, but it hurt too much. The pain returned full blast, and he suddenly remembered why Doug would be trying to comfort him. Everything was _not_ fine.

Tom concentrated on blocking out the memories, noises and pain. He hoped that they got to wherever they were going soon. He figured it was probably a hospital. He could only kind of remember why everything hurt. He hoped that when they reached their destination, the pain would stop. After a while, Tom blacked out again.

* * *

They finally arrived at the hospital. Doug had watched Tom closely during the ride, but he never seemed fully conscious. He moved a little and opened his eyes a bit, but that was all. Right now, he was unconscious. Doug feverently hoped he wasn't too late, and that Tom would be okay.

They brought Tom into the hospital, Doug following blindly, until a doctor stopped Doug from going any further than the waiting room. Doug watched his best friend be taken away to some random room, and then turned his eyes to the doctor.

He looked nice enough - he was a middle-aged, balding man with glasses. Still, Doug hated hospitals. The too-clean smell of them, being surrounding by dying, bleeding, hurt people and having to listen to the sobbing of friends and family of the patients were all factors about hospitals that made them decidedly not fun. And the fact that usually, when you went to a hospital, it was because you or someone you knew was hurt, or because you had to take a nasty shot or blood test or something.

Besides, everyone had bad memories of hospitals, especially Doug, as an accident-prone kid and as a police officer.

"Is he going to be okay?" Doug asked the doctor anxiously.

The doctor (his nameplate read Dr. Willis) paused for a terribly long time, and finally answered. "We don't know. We can't have any idea until we know all of his injuries. He's in ER right now. While we're waiting, could you tell me a few basic details about him? Do you know him well?"

Doug nodded, knowing the questions would be coming very soon. He would answer to the best of his ability; if the doctors could help Tom, then Doug would help the doctors. It was really quite simple.

"Okay," Dr. Willis said in his slow, calm voice. "First, what's your name?"

"Doug Penhall," Doug replied.

After a while of this, Doug had answered all the questions Dr. Willis needed about Tom and himself. He was allowed to do whatever he wanted, and Doug decided to call Fuller.

Even though it was early in the morning, around 5:00 AM, Fuller picked up the phone almost immediately.

"Adam Fuller."

"Captain? It's me, Doug."

"PENHALL!" Fuller's stern, loud tones almost deafened Doug's ears. "Where have you been? You're more than three hours late. And where's Hanson?"

"Uh, that's why I'm calling you," Doug said timidly. "Tom's… Tom's in the hospital."

He had finally said it. Doug licked his lips nervously, hoping Fuller would come. He didn't want to be the only one responsible for Tom. Doug had never taken responsibility very well.

After a long silence, Fuller finally answered. "What?"

"Tom's in the hospital," Doug repeated.

"As a patient?" Fuller asked (just to be sure), his voice betraying no emotion.

"Yeah… They beat him up – I think. Like they did to the gay men." Doug gulped, wondering why Tom had been beaten up. Had the homophobes found out that Tom was an undercover cop, that he was gay, or both? Or maybe the homophobes hadn't been involved at all, but that was very unlikely.

Tom would be able to tell them, if – no, when – he was okay.

"I'll be coming right away," Fuller said, interrupting Doug's musings. "What hospital is he in?"

"Um…" Doug stalled, realizing that in his daze he hadn't even found out the name of the hospital. Luckily, he could see the name and logo (a disgustingly pink tulip) all over the place. "East Garden Medical Center," Doug finally replied.

"Right," Fuller answered grimly. "I'll be there as soon as possible."

* * *

'As soon as possible' turned out to be almost two hours later. Fuller had a lot of things to do. First, he had to call everyone important to Tom who he thought should know about Tom's 'condition'. That included the whole Jumpstreet gang and Mrs. Hanson.

The phone call to Mrs. Hanson had been very uncomfortable. Having already lost her husband to the police force, Mrs. Hanson was almost hysterical when she found out about what had happened to her only son. She was especially upset because Fuller could offer no reassurance, having heard none himself, but at least the had promised to keep her posted.

Hoffs, Ioki, and Booker were all on a case, and they would be over as soon as they could escape from the suspects without suspicion.

It was almost 7:00 AM as Fuller drove to the hospital. With all his duties aside, he was finally able to worry about Tom.

Fuller cared a lot about his officers, more than he liked to admit and definitely more than he showed. He felt personally responsible whenever one of them was injured. He felt horrible about Tom and knew that Doug hadn't told him everything over the phone. Fuller had no idea how bad Tom was and only the vaguest idea of what had happened to him. He only knew that one of his best officers was in the hospital, and that Doug had probably been waiting for Fuller for over two hours.

Feeling guilty at that thought, Fuller gunned the accelerator, and five minutes later arrived at East Garden Medical Center.

* * *

Doug had waited anxiously, wishing Fuller would hurry up. He couldn't sleep or concentrate. He just fidgeted and paced until finally, over two hours past the phone call, Fuller walked into the waiting room.

Relieved, Doug walked over to meet him. "What took you so long?" he asked, a bit rudely.

Fuller gave Doug a stern glare but let the disrespect go for the moment. He knew Doug must be worried. His best friend was in the hospital, and he probably felt a least partially responsible. "I had to make a few phone calls," Fuller explained. "And the traffic was bad. Hoffs, Booker, and Ioki will be over as soon as they can, but while we're waiting, tell me exactly what happened and what you saw."

For the next half hour, Doug filled Fuller in on everything he knew about the case and what he suspected had happened to Tom. Of course, he didn't mention that Tom was gay. That wasn't for him to tell.

"So," Fuller said when Doug got to the part where he found Tom. "How did he look? How bad was he?"

"Really bad, Captain," Doug admitted sadly. "He was bleeding badly, and his face was bruised and swollen. It really looked like he was beaten up. And he was also having serious difficulty breathing, and had to pause between words when he talked… He was slipping in and out of conciousness, and I talked to him once, but he never really seemed to know what was going on. I'm really worried about him, Captain."

Doug stared hopefully at Fuller. He wanted reassurance, even though he knew he should know better. He was a mature adult (okay, maybe not mature, but he was an adult!) and a police offcer. He faced morality every day. He knew victims of beatings often died, and if they survived, they often suffered from conditions such as PTSD (Post Tramatic Stress Disorder) or other mental or physical problems. But Tom was strong in every way. With the support of his friends and family (and medical assistance), he _would_ make it.

As Doug suspected, Fuller was unable to offer any reassurance. The two sat in silence, lost in thought. While Doug convinced himself that Tom would make it, Fuller faced the facts. He thought of himself as sensible and relistc. From what Doug had said, it sounded like Tom was in a lot of trouble. But he had a chance. A very, very slim chance, but it was something.

Fuller and Doug passed the time until, finally, Dr. Willis came up to talk to them.

The doctor walked up with a grim expression on his lined face. "I'm afraid the news is not good," was the first thing Dr. Willis said to them.

Doug and Fuller exchanged glances. "Go on," Fuller said.

"Officer Thomas Hanson has at least eight broken ribs. His left leg is also broken. We expect that he has a concussion and internal bleeding. We've done everything we can for the moment. You can see him right now, but he's unconscious. You should prepare yourself – it won't look pretty."

Doug nodded. He knew exactly what Dr. Willis meant. Seeing Tom hooked up to all those machines would be hard. But he had to see him, had to know that he was alive. "I want to see him," Doug said.

"You go ahead," Fuller replied. Having just spotted Judy, Harry, and Booker enter the hospital, he added, "I'll tell Hoffs, Ioki, and Booker what's going on."

Doug nodded and allowed himself to be led though the white, sterile hallways to Room 28. Tom's room.

Doug took a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for what he was going to see. Then he opened the door and stepped in.

He hadn't prepared himself well enough. Tom lay in the bed, his eyes closed. Around him were what seemed like a hundred beeping machines, displaying all of his vitals. IV drips fed Tom, and he was breathing using a respirator. Tom himself looked terrible. A few seemingly mocking rays of light from the sun shone through the window onto Tom, throwing his injuries into sharp detail. His eyes were closed, and his skin was almost as white as the sheets covering him. His face was swathed with bandages. At least it had been cleaned of all the blood, but that only made his terrible bruises more visible. In colors ranging from blue to black to purple to yellow, they covered Tom's entire face. Doug winced just looking at them, cursing whoever had done this to Tom a thousand times over.

Tom looked surprisingly small and fragile, surrounded by the hulking machines and outlined by the sun. He also looked so… vulnerable. Doug was surprised, and a bit saddened; Tom was the strongest person he kenw. Never had he seemed fragile or vulnerable, not until he was fighting for his life in a hospital bed.

Doug swallowed and walked over to Tom. He studied Tom's face closely. He looked almost peaceful, as if he was sleeping instead of unconscious.

"Hey, buddy," Doug whispered, his voice cracking slightly.

He got no answer. Even though he wasn't expecting one, it was still disappointing and depressing. "Hang in there, Tom, please. You can't just leave us. We need you," Doug continued tearfully.

He watched the still, seemingly lifeless figure of his beast friend in the world. Doug could imagine Tom doing som many things – laughing, fighting, crying, making some smart-ass comment, giving one of his 'looks', losing that infamous and terrible temper of his. Tom comforting Doug, Tom annoying Doug, Tom teasing Doug. Tom as Tommy McQuaid. But none of the Toms Doug imagined were as lifeless, fragile, and vulnerable as the Tom lying before him. Suddenly, Doug couldn't stand it anymore. A single tear fell from his eyes onto Tom's bruised cheek. Doug gently wiped it off, and still Tom did not move. Doug sniffled, rubbed his eyes, and, feeling a bit stupid, told himself to get a grip. He walked out of Tom's room to where Fuller and the rest of the Jumpstreet gang were waiting.

* * *

By the time Doug reached Judy, Harry, and Dennis, they already knew everything. Doug could tell by the grim expressions on their faces. 

Harry was the first one to speak. "How is he?" he asked nevously.

"Bad," Doug said, for what felt like the tenth time. "He was unconscious when I saw him, hooked up to all these machines… and he didn't move, or say a thing… he looks really bad too…" Doug stopped talking, knowing that if he went on he would burst into tears. _You're 24,_ he mentally chided himself. _Get a grip on yourself._

Booker, Harry, Judy, and Fuller exchanged glances. They could all tell Doug was upset, but they didn't say anything. Mercifully, even Dennis was silent. He actually felt a bit out of place and awkward around all these people who were friends of Tom and who cared about him a lot. Dennis hardly knew Tom, but they had never liked each other, and Dennis had always taken extreme care to be as rude and mean as he could to Tom, and annoy him as much as possible. And now, Tom was in the hospital.

"Let's go see him," Harry said, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"Okay," Fuller agreed.

"I'll stay here," Doug said quietly. He didn't want to face Tom again, especially with other people in the room.

Fuller nodded in understanding and headed off towards Room 28. Booker and Ioki followed, but Judy hung back.

"Aren't you going?" Doug asked her.

"Yeah," she responded quietly. Judy was confused. She had been _so_ mad at Tom. That, she was able to handle. But now, he was severely injured in the hospital. It was possible that the last memory he'd have of Judy was her yelling at him, and then giving him the silent treatment. She felt tears sting her eyes and sniffed, blinking them away and feeling foolish.

Doug was immediately by her side. "It's okay to cry, Jude," he whispered, and she saw his hazel eyes were also tearful.

She gave in to her tears, and Doug held her as sobs wracked her body. Doug cried a few tears himself.

"We'll get through this, Jude," Doug told her quietly, wanting to believe what he was saying so badly it hurt. "In a few months, Tom will be fine, and so will we. We'll even be stronger because of it."

Judy smiled. Doug let go of her and she dried her tears. "Thank you," she told him sincerely.

Doug grinned. "We all need some comfort sometime."

"Come on," Judy replied with a small smile. She suddenly felt strong enough to face Tom, and she could tell Doug did too. "Tom's wating for us." She linked her arm with Doug's and, together, they walked to Room 28. Judy was now feeling quite optimistic. _We _will_ get through this, _she thought confidently. _And, just like Doug said, we'll be stronger because of it._

* * *

**A/N: **Yep, another dreaded author's note. Sorry about ending the chapter with a thought again, that's kinda tacky and repetitive I know, but I was having trouble deciding how I should end this chapter. Anyway, please let me know what you think about this chapter (and the pairings) by clicking the (as Nuky rightly said) 'wonderful review button'!


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